Is Bullying A Mental Disorder (Mental Health Discussion)

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Bullying behaviors that pose a risk to one’s physical, mental, or social safety may involve acts of harassment, threats of exclusion, and physical or verbal assault. Bullies may have different motivations than others, but they still share certain traits in common. Some bullies do it due to the fact that they believe it will help them achieve their goals, whereas other individuals bully simply because they are incredibly unhappy and insecure. Regardless, bullying is never appropriate, no matter what the reason or the setting.

Harassment and bullying are two different things. Any unwanted behavior that violates, degrades, or threatens a person is considered harassment. Even though it is sometimes a component of bullying, harassment can also occur between strangers or be a one-time dispute. It is not bullying if these behaviors are only displayed once. No matter how improper, actions involving disputes between equals do not qualify as bullying. Bullying cannot be defined solely by its actions.

Threats, negative remarks, and social exclusion are common tools used by bullies to damage and put off people. Such actions could be motivated by enthusiasm, a sense of helplessness, insecurity, or a craving for dominance. The repercussions on sufferers can be severe and even life-threatening, regardless of the cause.

Why Do People Bully?

There has been a tradition of unfortunate victims and individuals who chose to act like bullies. Some factors lead somebody on whether to bully an individual and behave in such a harsh and persistent way when doing so. Undoubtedly, a decrease in in-person social engagement and a mental health condition has been linked to low empathic action.

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Popularity

The lack of close parental involvement or supervision and the desire to gain popularity through bullying and other negative behaviors people think others in their social circle would find interesting are further contributing factors. Bullying may occasionally be a sign of one’s social standing. Popular individuals often foster relational hostility by teasing their less well-known peers. These popular people can additionally participate in slut-shaming, rumors, and social exclusion against others.

In the meantime, those who want attention may turn to bullying to move up the social ladder at school or work or acquire some social authority among other individuals. They may also intimidate others to lower someone else’s social standing.

Power

Bullying often occurs among those who crave power or authority. This is because they find getting power in social situations more alluring since they lack it in their individual lives. These people would rather deal with others only when it suits them. They turn to bullying if things and circumstances don’t go their way. To gain dominance, they frequently engage in relational aggression, sometimes known as a “mean girl” attitude.

When they hurt others, abusers feel strong and all-mighty. Any time, a bully can use different tormenting strategies to swiftly and easily inflict immense pain and agony on others without much thought given to the repercussions. They do not care as long as they think they are in control of the situation.

Pleasure

When bored and seeking amusement, some people occasionally turn to bullying to spice up their lives with chaos and excitement. Additionally, if their parents don’t provide enough attention or supervision, they may bully others non-stop. Bullying turns into a way for these people to obtain attention. It has been shown that how the brain processes pain varies in those with bullying problems and in neurotypical people.

In the meantime, individuals who lack remorse or empathy frequently take pleasure in hurting, offending, and humiliating the sentiments of others. They may find painful “jokes” humorous in addition to enjoying the feeling of power they obtain via tormenting others.

Peer Pressure

Bullying occurs when some individuals go against their self-interest in order to get along with a group. A lot of the time, these individuals are more anxious about being liked and blending in that they embrace bullying’s effects. Being a part of a structure that already exists typically requires these people to act or look a certain way.

Bullying can sometimes occur when someone just follows the pack, doesn’t complain about the action, and does not think differently. Bullying among peers might be caused by a person’s fear of rejection or of being the next person to be bullied.

Payback

After experiencing bullying, certain people search for measures to get even or take vengeance. These individuals are frequently called “bully victims,” and because they have also experienced harassment and suffering, they frequently believe that their behavior is acceptable. They could feel vindicated and relieved after what they went through when they hurt individuals they respect. These people occasionally pick on those who are weaker or perhaps more susceptible than them. They may even pursue the bully act in other instances where they pretend to be the victim while acting out as a bully.

While they may not physically harm others in some instances, some individuals with this bullying condition will exhibit a violent obsession. Emotional recovery may be delayed, and bad feelings may be retained. Pursuing vengeance can strain one’s social bonds and frequently result in a greater sense of loneliness and isolation.

Problems at Home

Since violence and aggressive behavior are modeled for them, people from abusive families are more prone to bullying. Individuals with irresponsible or absent parents may engage in bullying. They feel empowered and in charge, which they lack in their lives. Furthermore, these people with poor self-worth may bully to mask their low self-esteem. Bullies often struggle to find their place at home and take out the emotional strain on others.

Bullying among siblings can also result in bullying at school or at work. A smaller sibling feels helpless when their elder brother or sister mocks and torments them. Or a high-ranking clerk bullies the lower-ranked ones. They bully others in an attempt to reclaim their occasional sense of authority, which they do not usually experience in any available settings.

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According to certain studies, abusers who use bullying are a result of their issues with psychological and emotional well-being. Some see the act as helpful since it allows them to deal with their lack of self-worth. They believe it is going to make them more acceptable to their friends. The power-hungry do it for their ego and harass other people.

Bullies occasionally have gloomy futures of their own, regardless of the causes. People who harass, intimidate, or humiliate others are more inclined to take drugs or alcohol excessively, get into arguments, commit crimes, quit or drop out of school, or harm their families or romantic partners.

The answers and remedies to every kind of bullying incidence must also be unique due to their distinct reasons. Regretfully, when it comes to bullying, there is no “one size fits all” solution.

However, some things can be done to help overcome bullying experiences.

Talking To A School Official: It is not a good idea to keep school administrators unaware of bullying incidents because they only occur on school property. It could be challenging to talk to another person at school, but when you do, you might appreciate the support system. Since schools have strong anti-bullying and cyberbullying rules, they have policies to deal with the toxic act.

Confide In Parents Or Trusted Friends: Talk to your parents, family members, or other trusted people about your bullying experience. Feeling supported will help you prevent you from feeling isolated. Spend some time discussing any issues you are having, both within and outside of school, over a meal with your loved ones. Talk openly and honestly about how you feel about the instances of bullying that you have encountered.

Report It On Social Media: Social media platforms have rigorous policies about the kinds of interactions and information sharing permitted in their system. By reporting the perpetrator to the website, you might get them blocked and cut off from communication. Bullying is still bullying that frequently violates and breaks the terms of service. Therefore, report incidents of cyberbullying to the administrators of the app or website when you experience one.

Ignore The Bully: The best way to act with a bully is to never engage with them; try as much as you can to avoid getting near them or causing any interaction with them. The more you show them that you do not want to be part of their antics, the more you’ll find ways to distance yourself from their toxic behaviors. 

Seek Police Help: Every act of bullying varies in severity. Reporting bullying to the authorities in your neighborhood is another option if it involves any possible danger of physical harm. Long-lasting consequences may result from bullying, and repairing the harm done may require more than your supportive words and guidance if the abuse has been very severe.

In Conclusion

Keep in mind that it just takes a tiny step to escalate from harmless jokes to a full-fledged onslaught of bullying. The absence of in-person communication combined with the sense of authority that comes from the desire for power and popularity develops into a persistent campaign of intimidation, humiliation, and threats of physical violence. As was already indicated, the effect of bullying may cause long-lasting emotional distress or even result in suicide.

If you are experiencing it, do not hesitate to seek help.

What Are The Types Of Cyberbullying? (Know What You’re Dealing With)

 

The internet has a lot to offer, and one of the best ways to experience it is through social media. There, you can socialize and have a reliable connection with other people in all parts of the globe. But along with its benefits, social media is not a safe space, especially when you are dealing with mental and emotional stress due to hate and cyberbullying.

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What Is Cyberbullying

The use of computer technology to intimidate, harass, humiliate, or target another individual is known as cyberbullying. Threats made digitally, as well as nasty, violent, or harsh posts, tweets, texts, or messages, all qualify. Posting private pictures, recordings, or other content intending to hurt or embarrass another individual also counts.

Bullying via online platforms, such as gadgets such as tablets, computers, and cell phones, is known as cyberbullying. It can also happen online via social media, forums, or games where users can watch, interact with, or exchange material. It can also happen via text messages, phone calls, and apps. It involves distributing, publishing, or circulating hurtful, foul, misleading, or derogatory content that would publicly shame or degrade another person.

Some specifics of cyberbullying cases include posting mean or hurtful comments about the victim online, spreading rumors, commenting with sexual meaning, impersonating the individual, commenting negatively about the individual, race, color, and religion, and creating a hurtful webpage about the victim.

Bullies occasionally utilize group conversations as a means of organizing an attack on a single victim. Additionally, they occasionally break into an individual’s web page account and alter any content, including an image or the “About Me” section, to anything offensive or dangerous. Some take pictures of people in their underwear or other demeaning situations without their permission and share them widely on social media.

There are several sites available for cyberbullies to use in their attempts to harass, hurt, humiliate, threaten, or put off others. Just a few of the potential media networks are Reddit, TikTok, Snapchat, Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. 

Special Concerns

Due to the widespread use of social media and online forums, people’s shared content—including postings, images, comments, and posts—can frequently be viewed by individuals who are not acquainted with them. Anything a person posts online, whether private or offensive, cruel or unpleasant, leaves an irreversible publicly accessible record of their opinions, actions, and behaviors.

This widely available record, which may be compared to an online reputation, may be viewed by organizations, educational institutions, universities, schools, clubs, and other organizations doing current or future background checks. Cyberbullying can damage the online good standing of all parties involved, including the tormented individual as well as those who engage in the cyberbullying act.

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Concerns about cyberbullying are distinctive since it might be:

Persistent

Since cell phones and other electronic devices allow for instantaneous and continuous communication around the clock, it might be challenging for those individuals who are being bullied online to seek and get help.

Permanent

If not reported and deleted, most information shared digitally is permanent and available to the public. A bad internet public image can affect one’s ability to get work, get into better schools and universities, and succeed in other facets of life.

Hard to Notice

It can be more difficult to identify cyberbullying because parents and teachers might not hear or witness it occurring.

Hard Truth About Cyberbullying

It isn’t easy to deal with cyberbullying when you are the target of it. It seems you’re stuck with nowhere to go but downward. Targets of cyberbullying rarely get the chance to stand up for themselves. There are no parents or teachers to witness what is happening and step in to end it. Additionally, cyberbullying can occur in a completely private setting, giving the person being harassed little way to take action or report the abusive individual to a higher authority. Additionally, it can use social media platforms to quickly and negatively expose bullying instances to thousands or even hundreds of thousands of people.

The bully can easily make a new account if the victim decides to block them on social media and knows who the abuser is. Alternatively, they can use a friend’s social media account, SMS, or email since bullies nowadays are very tech-savvy and resourceful. There is little that an innocent person can do to put an end to someone who is determined to bully them online.

Cyberbullying is, all things considered, more severe, persistent, and harmful than conventional harassment. It is also among the biggest sources of anxiety in the lives of young adults. Even while victims of bullying frequently try to hide these incidents from their loved ones, there is no escaping the mental and emotional damage the negative act can bring.

It’s interesting to note that other negative consequences of cyberbullying include inadequate self-worth, psychological health problems, increased stress and worry, depression, and aggressive behaviors. Even when the bullying has stopped, cyberbullying can have an emotional and psychological impact that lasts a lifetime.

Impact Of Cyberbullying

  • Reduced social interactions, such as avoiding friends and social gatherings
  • spending more time alone in their room than usual
  • lowering one’s voice often, becoming quieter, or withdrawing
  • Having trouble focusing on academic tasks
  • declining grades
  • losing interest in things once used to enjoy
  • deciding to skip school or indicating a desire to do so
  • displaying rage when using a computer, tablet, or phone
  • concealing the screen of their computer or phone
  • Staying away from their phone
  • Taking alcohol or drugs
  • displaying depressing feelings or thoughts
  • causing self-harm 
  • Discussing suicide often
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What Are The Types Of Cyberbullying?

Harassment

You may become the target of harassment if you receive abusive or violent messages from other people over a long period. This type of cyberbullying is extremely dangerous for your mental and emotional health. It might significantly affect your well-being. The messages that are sent can affect your confidence and sense of self-worth and instill dread in your head because they are typically cruel or malicious. There’s no break from cyberbullying because of the nonstop use of messages. The cyberbully goes to great lengths to inflict suffering and terror.

Social Exclusion

The intentional leaving of another individual out is known as social exclusion. You may be noticeably left out of the discussion, social interaction, or chats involving mutual acquaintances or friends, or you may be specifically excluded from a group or gathering that “everyone” is talking about or attending. Here, the intention adds the hostile component that turns simple avoidance into rejection and, consequently, abusive behavior.

Outing or Doxing

The act of disclosing private or sensitive information about somebody without the individual’s permission in order to cause them pain or embarrassment is called an outing, often referred to as doxing. When it comes to cyberbullying, doxing might mean releasing someone’s private or confidential messages on an internet chat room or revealing private images of the individual without their consent.

Trickery

Trickery is just an outing or boxing with a dash of deceit applied. The harasser will make friends with their victim in these circumstances in an attempt to give them a false sense of comfort and security. Once the bully acquires the victims’ confidence and trust, they take advantage of it by willfully disclosing the victim’s secrets and personal data to other people, leaving them vulnerable to judgments and negative criticisms.

Cyberstalking

This type of cyberbullying act might involve the cyberbully really posing a risk to your safety or physical well-being. Cyberstalking is also the term used to describe the behavior of adults contacting or private messaging and attempting to meet young individuals or children for sex over the Internet. It’s a particularly hazardous kind of cyberbullying that might have significant consequences if action to stop it isn’t taken right away.

Fraping

Frapping, which is no longer exclusive to Facebook, is the term used to describe the act of a bully taking over a victim’s social media profile and posting offensive or dehumanizing stuff with the intention of making that individual feel bad about themselves. Frapping is performed for an audience that is mediated.

Catfishing or Creating Fake Profiles

When someone wants to bully you online, they can make up a fake profile to conceal their true identity.  Usually, it entails making up a social media profile or email address and then sending or uploading offensive or dehumanizing messages to other people you may or may not know. Catfishing is the practice of someone using your online persona—typically videos and photos—to build false social media pages.

Dissing

The act of a bully distributing derogatory information about their victim in either publicly or privately messaging to harm that person’s reputation or interpersonal connections is known as dissing. Bullies frequently utilize accurate information, but they distort it somewhat to tell an engaging narrative. In these circumstances, the victim and the bully typically have a personal relationship, either as friends or acquaintances.

Trolling

When someone purposefully tries to provoke unfavorable responses by making offensive or offensive remarks online, like in an online social media community or thread, this is known as trolling. When someone engages in trolling with the intention of causing harm or eliciting a reaction, it is considered cyberbullying. Bullies who engage in harassment often have no personal connection to the people they target and are more interested in stirring up trouble in general.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

What Are The Different Types Of Cyberbullying Detection?

What Are 3 Ways In Which Cyberbullying Can Impact Your Mental Health?

What Do You Think Are The Factors Of Cyberbullying?

What Are The Types Of Emotional Effects Of Cyberbullying?

What Is The Psychological Perspective Of Cyberbullying?

What Are 4 Factors Of Cyberbullying?

What Are The Levels Of Cyberbullying?

What Are The Social Problems Of Cyberbullying?

Is Cyberbullying A Disinhibition?

What Is The Fatal Impact Of Cyberbullying?

What Mental Illness Is Linked To Cyberbullying?

Is Social Media Addiction Linked To Cyberbullying?

Is Cyberbullying A Mental Health Issue?

How Does Anonymity Affect Cyberbullying?

Is Cyberbullying Bad For Mental Health?

Understanding Pediatric Therapy: Improving Pediatric Mental Health and Development

Pediatric therapy: Join us as we embark on a trip to investigate its complexities, during which we will highlight the vital role that pediatric therapy counselors play in promoting the well-being of your kid. Learn about the essential principles of treatment in pediatrics as we study how it helps the general growth and development of your kid while you are informed about these fundamental aspects.

Pediatric therapy - fun time
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Pediatric Therapy For Improving Children’s Overall Mental Well-Being And How It Can Help Resolve Other Mental Conditions

Do children’s counselors in a clinical setting work with children of all ages and developmental stages? Let’s delve deeper into understanding how pediatric therapy works, its benefits, and the role of children’s counselors in this informative article.

According to a team of pediatric therapy associates and psychologists whose expertise and skills lie in the treatment, the mental state of a patient depends on parenting behavior. Treatment places an emphasis on mental well-being and mental health problems in bullying.

Things That Affect Children’s Overall Mental Health And Their Well-Being

As per pediatric therapy is concerned, the reasons for pediatric psychological issues are quite trivial. Your parenting mistakes merely cause your kid’s anxiety and low self-esteem. So what are these character traits that cause your child’s wrong behavior? BetterHelp made a list for you concerning effective pediatric therapy and other pediatric issues.

 

Children who are under scrutiny or facing challenges can greatly benefit from the specialized care and support provided by pediatric therapy.
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Resolving Mistakes Parents Make According To Children’s Counselors

Helicopter Parenting. According to most pediatric therapists, this act of always watching and scrutinizing your children leads to psychological issues such as a lack of independence. It hinders them from making significant decisions for themself as family and community members, and they think that the world is never safe without you in it. Your children may need counseling to deal with their issues.

“Helicopter parenting typically describes hyper-involved. They try to guide, coax, compel or even force children to do what they think is “best” for him/them,” Mike Brooks, Ph.D., therapist explains.

Imposing A Feeling Of Guilt. When you encourage your children by enumerating the list of your sacrifices, you are not doing them a favor. Instead, you are imposing guilt that leads to constant pressure and stress.

Focusing On Strict Compliance. Understandably, you want to encourage your children to do their best in everything. However, pediatric counselors say that too much pushing can lead to restlessness and exhaustion. Thus, your kids need to feel complete relaxation for them to be able to work productively. This is what pediatric therapy has emphasized – that patients be provided with resources for them to relax.  If they don’t, you are taking away an essential aspect of their life – childhood.

Questioning Their Capabilities. One of the primary reasons children experience a mental condition is constant doubt about their capabilities. According to therapists, they might grow into an adult who subconsciously focuses themselves in adverse situations and might even need treatment. Most therapists advise that parents should trust their children’s abilities and coordination.

Deciding For Your Kid. Most counselors believe that the essence of thinking that your child is still not mature enough to make decisions in certain activities is bad parenting behavior. That is according to ABA therapy experts. As per treatment principles, when you make firm arrangements for your wonderful kids because you think that they’re too young to understand what’s good and what’s bad for them, you’re not only depriving them of their rights but also limiting their skill range, mental equipment, and creative capabilities to creating necessary adjustments.

Lack Of Sensitivity. It is normal for kids to express their emotions, so frequently stopping them from showing a weak side leads to an emotional shutdown. A child eventually learns to suppress emotions, and that can turn into psychosomatic issues. He may have problems identifying the different feelings and psychological responses. It would be a great time to achieve specific advice from counselors’ offices.

“Talking about emotions helps children learn about their own and other people’s internal experiences. Wrapping big, messy emotions up in words makes them seem more understandable and therefore more manageable,” says clinical psychologist Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Ph.

The kid's playing but he may have problems identifying the different feelings and psychological responses.
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Ways On How To Handle Children With Different Mental Health Conditions: Don’t Delay!

Many pediatric therapists emphasize the importance of commitment when working with children, whether their needs involve sensory integration, motor planning, autism support, speech-language, or other aspects of development. However, it’s crucial to take full responsibility for your actions and exercise care when making decisions that impact children and their families.

Ronald E. Riggio, Ph.D., further explains, “Parenting style has a big impact on how children develop into adults, and there are important implications for their future success.”

Evaluate yourself and think about how you can create an impact on the child’s development and milestones with or without an occupational therapy expert or speech therapy expert of speech-language pathologists. Always remember that though parenting mistakes are common, there’s a higher price to pay if you don’t do an early intervention to treat children.

If you need assistance in understanding the process of pediatric therapy, contact a professional via phone or email. `

Frequently Asked Questions

What if I am unsure if my child needs physical therapy or occupational therapy or feeding therapy services, or an applied behavior analysis?

What is pediatric therapy?

Pediatric therapy is specialized healthcare for children, covering various therapies like physical, occupational, speech, and behavioral therapy. Its goal is to address children’s developmental, physical, and emotional needs, providing tailored solutions to support their success and overall well-being.

Why do kids need occupational therapy?

What are occupational therapy examples?

How much of my child’s speech should I (and others) be able to understand at this age?

How does pediatric therapy help your child?

Pediatric therapy addresses your child’s unique developmental, physical, emotional, and sensory needs. Whether it’s improving mobility, communication, or managing conditions like autism, therapists from a specialized pediatric therapy practice offer tailored support to help children reach their potential, boost confidence, and enhance overall well-being.

Do children like pediatric therapy services like speech-language pathology or speech-language therapy?

Children’s reactions to multi-disciplinary pediatric therapy services like speech-language pathology or speech-language therapy, offered by pediatric therapy solutions, can vary. Some children may enjoy the engaging activities and support provided by therapists, while others might initially find it challenging. The perception of therapy often depends on factors like the therapist’s approach, the child’s age, and their progress in therapy. Creating a positive and supportive environment can help children develop a more favorable view of therapy over time.

Why is pediatric treatment important?

Pediatric treatment, including therapy for your child, is crucial because it caters to the specific needs of children, ensuring their healthy development and addressing any medical, developmental, behavioral, and social concerns early on. Pediatric treatments center on early intervention. Along with a child-centered and family-centered approach, this fosters a positive healthcare experience and sets the stage for a child’s lifelong well-being.

What is pediatric physical therapy?

What do occupational therapists do?

Do ADHD kids need occupational therapy?

What is the goal of pediatric occupational therapy?

The goal of pediatric occupational therapy, often provided by pediatric therapy associates, is to help children develop the essential sensory and life skills they need to thrive in daily life. Occupational therapists work with children to improve their independence in tasks like dressing and eating, enhance motor skills, boost cognitive abilities, foster social and emotional skills, and support children with special needs.

Is occupational therapy free?

Why would a child need physical therapy?

Children may require physical therapy for a range of reasons, including developmental delays, musculoskeletal conditions, orthopedic injuries, neurological disorders, sports-related injuries, post-surgical rehabilitation, chronic health conditions, coordination and balance issues, gait abnormalities, and pain management. Pediatric physical therapy, often provided at a therapy center by experienced therapy associates, is individualized to address the specific needs of each child, focusing on improving mobility, strength, and overall physical function to enhance their quality of life and independence.

Will my child with ADHD live a normal life?

Principles Of Effective Couples Therapy

Effectiveness of couples therapy?

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What exactly is couples therapy and what are its benefits? Does it only focus on distant and warring partners? Or can those who are just starting to experience minor relationship problems and concerns take something away from it as well? Do history’s leading relationship experts provide clear and helpful guidelines for couples therapy? Learn more about couples therapy and all its benefits here.

Most people have heard about couples therapy one way or another but not much is known about the directions for doing it in a way that works. Do practical guides for seeking couples therapy as partners really help relationship experts provide successful solutions for partners in trouble? And when can you say that it is effective? When excellent clinical insight and clinical wisdom is present? What are other telltale signs that couples therapy is actually working?

This article will offer clients couples therapy advice. Learn more about this practical guide backed by reliable research findings on helpful tips, insights, guidance, and strategies offered by professional therapists specializing in partnerships and relationships.

Understanding How Important It Is To Marriage Guidance

If you and your loved one are experiencing relationship troubles, you may have considered the effectiveness of couples therapy. However, with relatively low success rates and the stress of working out problems, many couples feel overwhelmed and discouraged by the idea. This is the reason why psychiatrists and other professionals have delved more into emotionally focused therapy.

The problem with couples therapy usually lies in the fact that distant and warring couples often only seek help when the troubles are already quite deep in their joint personal history. “When couples have tried and tried to improve their relationship and nothing has worked, a heap of skepticism about whether it could possibly work makes sense,” wrote practicing psychologist, one of history’s leading couples therapists, and Harvard University lecturer Holly Parker, Ph.D.

Despite this, however, she says that “It may ultimately surprise couples with how much it can make a difference.” Hence, it is important that partners consider treatment, whether things have just started getting rocky or they have already begun growing distant. Relationship skill deficits underlie partnership deterioration, which is why communication is essential at any relationship stage.

Method Differences In Counseling

As one of the country’s leading couples therapists, the Gottman Method of Couples Therapy developed by the world’s leading researchers, John and Julie Gottman, has become a helpful tool for both same-sex marriages and heterosexual couples. While immensely popular, the art in this approach is actually pretty simple. This Gottmans’ evidence-based approach is based on the ten principles that guide the national clinical training program and provide a clinical map for other therapists and relationship experts to follow. By using the Gottmans’ clinical map, therapists can help couples overcome challenges and strengthen their relationships.

As the co-founder and president of The Gottman Institute, John Gottman has dedicated his career to scientific research on what makes couples thrive. As a clinical professor, he has also studied same sex couples and the impact of factors like lesbian adoption on relationships. His research based wisdom is reflected in his Marriage Clinic Casebook, a comprehensive book that provides therapists with evidence based principles of couples therapy that are effective to help couples overcome challenges and build stronger relationships.

The skills needed in this method are an entirely different animal, or must I say, completely alien from that of individual treatment. When done right, it can produce positive and long-term effects. According to many psychotherapists, the key is to use different techniques which effectively work for both parties, even with a bit of trial and error involved. After all, what works for one person might not necessarily work for the other. This is why communication and a willingness to try are important.

You can match methods from Imago relationship counseling, family therapy, and other effective couples therapy informed by your therapist. Imago relationship therapy and its various versions commonly guide numerous professionals who practice in private. But always remember to apply clear and helpful guidelines when doing so.

Fundamental Principles Of Seeking Treatment Together

It Changes Your View Of A Relationship

During this process, the goal of effective marriage help is for each couple to look at the relationship objectively and avoid placing the blame on the other. It’s not healthy to point fingers at each other, especially when you’re trying to work things out. A professional well-versed in the principles of couples therapy will employ techniques to help them see their union in a particular context. This, in turn, will help each individual see things from the other’s perspective, which will result in more empathy and a deeper understanding.

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For example, for partners undergoing financial troubles, there are specific ways for each one to effectively adapt until the money issues are resolved through effective couples therapy principles. Couples therapists utilize various data-gathering forms to improve upon their method and clinical insight. This is what makes it more effective. As their sessions continue, the more insight is gained. This is where principles of effective couples therapy come in.

Moreover, the Gottman Method is a skill-building model that draws on the iconic research of the Gottman Institute on marital success. This approach is based on 10 principles that provide extraordinary therapists with a coherent theory to develop a treatment plan. The method includes scientific research and tools

In this case, the therapist would suggest a successful intervention or clinical wisdom for effectively managing finances as a couple. By pointing out the problems, the couple can put aside their pride and learn to work as a team to effectively solve the issues head-on. Effective couples therapy principles, even outside the consulting rooms, is useful.

It Modifies Dysfunctional Behavior

Ineffective couples therapy, the professional also needs to end behaviors that cause physical or emotional distress. Among the principles of couples therapy is that if one partner is physically abusive, he must first be dealt with individually.

Emotionally Focused Counseling

One way to do this is to put him in a domestic violence shelter for a while. A similar method that is taught in therapy can be done for a partner suffering from substance abuse or alcoholism.

Doing so not only helps the relationship, it keeps both healthy, safe and in a much better position to solve the couple’s issues. With issues such as these, “[a] good therapist will not judge you, but needs to know everything in order to help you,” clinical psychologist and one of the world’s leading couple therapists Barbara Markway, Ph.D., says.

It Decreases Emotional Problems And Provides Assistance During Distress

Principles of effective couples therapy would also enforce communication between couples who may have deeply buried and unexpressed feelings. Blake Griffin Edwards, LMFT, wrote, “Couples who do not experience mutuality usually channel feelings of sadness, fear, or shame through self-protective or coercive behaviors that fail to achieve what is needed to move beyond them.”

He added, “When such interactions evolve into patterns, couples often experience a loss of trust or a heightening of fear in their relationship, which buries the deeper emotions even further.”

Many pairs lose intimacy over time because their everyday issues may have discouraged them from expressing themselves effectively and healthily. The concept of therapy is to prevent the couple from growing apart because of the emotional distance.

This may be difficult because it requires the couple to break old habits, but it is often a good stepping stone to resolving other couples’ issues.

It Genuinely Improves Communication

That being said, effective couples therapy principles should be able to address all communication problems between partners. The basis of this is that communication is a must to achieve intimacy effectively.

According to research findings, physical and emotional abuse, and even emotional avoidance, might be seen by one partner as the only way to express himself. Many couple’s struggles are caused by this root problem. By introducing more effective and less destructive methods in the treatment, the couple can start being on the same page again.

A professional can achieve this through simple exercises and provide each individual with an outlet to talk without interruption.

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It Promotes Strength And Patience

Active marriage help would be able to point out many positive qualities of each couple and how they contribute to a healthy and harmonious relationship.

One idea is to let a couple reaffirm their reasons to keep a relationship going and to equip them for any future problems that they may encounter after this treatment has concluded.

Principles And Benefits Of Effective Couples Therapy

For a relationship to work out, it takes both individuals’ effort, time, and perseverance. But despite all these, and the change will still not take place, then your best option is to get professional help.

Here is a guide on how to choose a highly respected clinical psychologist, psychotherapist, or psychiatrist for marriage help: https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/psychologists/reasons-to-choose-an-online-psychiatrist/.

Effective Couples Therapy FAQs

What are the 3 parts of working on your relationship according to the Gottman Method?

According to the Gottman Method, developed by John and Julie Schwartz, the three parts of working on your relationship are: building friendship, managing conflicts effectively, and creating shared meaning. These form the core principles for doing effective couples work.

What is the most effective form of couples therapy?

The most effective form of couples therapy often varies based on individual needs, but many consider the Gottman Method to be among the leading approaches. It’s grounded in research by the leading couple and therapist duo, John and Julie Schwartz Gottman.

What is the Gottman relationship method?

The Gottman relationship method, developed by John and Julie Schwartz Gottman, provides insight guidance, even specific guidance and strategies to enhance relationship satisfaction, addressing conflicts and fostering understanding. It’s based on extensive research and practice to promote healthier relationships.

What is a psychobiological approach to couples therapy?

The psychobiological approach to couples therapy integrates biological and psychological theories to understand and address relationship dynamics. It emphasizes how our physiology and past experiences work together to shape our interactions in intimate relationships.

What is the pact method?

The PACT method, standing for Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy, provides couples with tools and guidance to understand their triggers and responses in relationships. It delves deep into how a person’s early-life experiences can shape their behavior in relationships.

What is Imago therapy for couples?

What are the 3 stages of love?

What type of therapy is best for couples?

What does couples therapy look like?

What questions do they ask in couples therapy?

 

Therapist: It Took Me Too Long  To Figure Out I Was Getting Bullied

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I was the least impressionable kid in my neighborhood growing up. While many of the children oohed and aahed whenever they saw a pair of new kicks or a new gadget, I could look at it without obsessing over it and begging my mom to get me one. If someone wore trendy clothes or a cool bag to school, I would not even spare them a glance, even though the other kids would undoubtedly flock over them.

I used to think that I was normal, to be honest. My parents always wanted to spoil me; I could get anything I wanted without begging them for it. However, I could not care less for technological devices or other worldly materials as mom and dad happened to teach me the need to reduce non-biodegradable waste on the planet.

Did the other kids think I was normal? I used to believe so, yes. I did not have enemies who called me out at the playground during recess to fight. Some of my classmates would listen to my stories about eco-friendliness and how we could save the Earth even if we were young. I want to think that I had a fantastic childhood surrounded by friends and family.

Realizing The Truth

I held on to the belief that people liked me until I went to high school. Most of the students there belonged to my neighborhood, so I knew them well. But then, a girl named Sugar transferred to our school during my senior year.

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It was typical for kids who grew up together to exclude the newcomers from their group. Knowing that that’s how they would treat Sugar, I volunteered to give her a tour of the campus. I showed the new student around and even thought of introducing her to anyone I saw in the corridors.

When the tour was over, I was still in high spirits due to the prospect of having a new friend. However, I did not expect to hear what Sugar told me.

“I could not stand our schoolmates,” Sugar uttered. “Where I came from, the things I saw them do to you were indirect bullying. No one should experience that. How long have they been doing that to you?”

All I could do was stare back at Sugar with my mouth hanging open. “Did you say that I was getting bullied? Me? That cannot be right because everyone has been so nice to me,” I insisted.

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My new classmate shrugged. “You do not have to believe me if you do not want to, but all the signs are there. Perhaps you have never noticed it because that’s how those kids have been treating you since.”

Although I remained unwilling to accept Sugar’s observation, I decided to research indirect bullying online. I could not fathom if I were happy or sad about doing this, considering I realized that my new classmate was correct. I had been getting bullied, and it took me forever to figure it out.

How Did The Realization Affect Me?

It opened my eyes for real. It was gutting that the kids I thought were friendly to me might have been snickering behind my back or calling me names. Did I even have friends at all? I had no clue.

Almost at the same time, I began to recall parts of my childhood when I experienced indirect bullying. For instance, there were times when the other kids would not share their lunch table with me, claiming that they were saving a seat for someone else. Other times, they would seem to pay attention to my lectures about Mother Earth, but then I realized that they were doing it to make fun of me.

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The realizations made me want to cry, of course. It meant that I most likely did not have friends at all. I felt alone and said because of it.

How Did Things Get Better?

Sugar instantly became my new best friend. I liked that she immediately noticed that I was getting bullied – a feat that I might never have known if she had not told me. We became inseparable throughout high school.

Besides getting a new friend, my parents decided that I should go to therapy to learn how to understand other people’s actions. It was not a cakewalk – I wanted to give up one too many times. Still, my therapist was kind enough to encourage me to get on with the program.

Fast Forward To 2021

I had always wanted to become a surgeon but changed my mind at the last minute because of my experience with indirect bullying. Instead, I chose to become a psychiatrist and eventually an on-call school counselor so that I could help kids getting bullied, whether they knew about it or not.

 

Therapist Answers: Who Experiences Bullying At Work?

When was the first time that you heard the term “white privilege”?

I was oblivious of this term throughout my childhood. Since my parents raised me on a farm in Montana, I got homeschooled and did not see many people of other colors or races. Even our farmhands were part of the family, so I remained sheltered for years.

I only learned about white privilege once I started working at a company for the first time. I was waiting for a taxi in front of the company building along with other employees, not knowing that it was actually a queue, and I was on the far end of it. When a cab stopped in front of me, I just hopped into it. Unfortunately, I did not do it fast enough since I heard someone sigh behind me and say, “That’s a white privilege for you.”

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I looked back, hoping to see who they were talking about, but my face went red as I realized everyone was staring at me. Some were disappointed; others were disgusted. I tried to explain and apologize for my action, but the people began to say nasty words about me. Shocked and afraid, I asked the driver to take me to my apartment stat.

What Happened?

It took me a while to realize what I experienced. I was lucky to become friends with a therapist who lived in the same building as my apartment because she explained everything to me.

“You got judged of cutting in line, even though you did not mean to do that. You have been stereotyped in the process since many people with fairer complexion than others act like gods. In a way, that’s a form of bullying.”

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My eyes widened in shock upon learning about it. I was not born yesterday; I heard and read about bullying ages ago. However, since I always watched my actions and tried to be friendly to everyone, I never expected to be on the receiving end of it. Thus, I did not manage to prepare for the jarring feeling I experienced afterward – no less in the vicinity of my workplace.

The therapist told me that stereotyping is not the only thing that can get you bullied. You may also deal with it if:

You Are Well-Liked By Others

The primary reason behind bullying is the victim’s popularity. You will find at least a single envious person in every company, you see. If others like them, they will undoubtedly band together to take down the most well-liked individual at work.

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You Are Exceptionally Attractive

If you have a God-given beauty that does not require too much enhancement, people tend to feel jealous of you. That’s when some folks can get childish and spread the word that you only got your job because of your looks. Worse, they may get malicious and say that you are romantically involved with one of the bosses so that others will shun you.

You Come From A Minority Group

It is also common to find individuals bullied due to their ethnicity, religious beliefs, and whatnot. Although my companies try to reduce incidences like that to avoid getting accused of racial discrimination, the sad truth is that it still happens these days. Some people merely feel superior over others since they belong to the majority group.

You Get Judged For Your Previous Actions

The government encourages companies to hire reforming offenders, drug addicts, etc. Their goal is to give such people a second chance in life and keep them from reoffending. Despite those positive intentions, ex-convicts can experience bullying at work, especially from people who either fear them or feel too precious to be around them.

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You Do Not Fight Back

Furthermore, you can experience bullying if you make it known from the beginning that you do not engage in confrontations. Bullies are drawn to such characters because they interpret the action – or lack thereof – due to fear towards them. It may not even cross their mind that the people they are bullying are not fighting back since they are not worth the effort.

Final Thoughts

Bullying remains a problem in many institutions. If you have different views, you can get bullied. If you look different, you can get bullied. The perpetrators may not always do the bullying in the open to avoid public backlash, but it does not mean that it’s not happening behind closed doors.

I was lucky because the company building was massive enough to avoid crossing paths with the employees who accused me of enjoying white privilege. Remembering their judgmental stares hurt me for days, even though it was somewhat mild compared to what others experienced. I even considered going back home, but I realized that I should not let the bullies affect me too much. All I could do was make peace with the incident and move on.

The Need For Counseling Over A Stressful Job

During this pandemic, the most important thing that almost everyone wants and others do not want to lose is their jobs. That is because, in uncertain times like this, everything can become complicated. People deal with constant financial burdens due to the global health crisis, and no one can do anything about the cutbacks. A lot of industries are pausing or lowering their production, and more companies are shutting down. Unemployment is everywhere, and people are struggling to get a decent occupation.

Understandably, the whole world is dealing with a lack of opportunity due to the health crisis. That explains why sometimes, even the ones that don’t pay enough get highly in demand. Perhaps that is because the rate is not an important factor in this situation, but getting a job is. Having food on the table to feed the family is the main priority of all individuals. But what if that job is taking a toll on people’s lives? What if that particular job is causing a lot of emotional, physical, and mental trouble?

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If It Is Too Stressful, Should You Leave?

Many people would say that when the job is becoming too stressful, one should quit it. There are warning signs that indicate when it is time to leave and let go of the damaging routine. But many would agree today that statement only applies to the years where the world is still okay. Now that there is a pandemic and jobs are almost nowhere to find, people no longer see it that way. Meaning, despite the job being toxic and having less than minimum rate, it is considered a life-changing opportunity, especially for those who can’t afford to put food on the table.

But on a lighter note, given that people can still have many options, they can do things if their job literally makes them sick. When the situation gets unbearable, unlivable, and unhealthy, people need to consider making significant life-work decisions.

Express Disappointment In A Professional Way

If the job or workplace condition is somewhat toxic and takes a toll on the daily function of individuals affecting the production, then it is time to let the managers know about the issue. It is best to discuss problems concerning the job to avoid overreacting to small things about it. That way, both employees and managers or bosses can work on alternatives. But people should be mindful that expressing thoughts and feelings does not guarantee them a solid agreement. Sometimes, other people are hard to deal with, and not all excuses or reasoning are convincing and acceptable. Thus, whatever happens, the decisions should be respected at all costs.

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Remember That It Is Not All About You

Most bosses and superiors would not care if people feel like their job is getting stressful. That is because these individuals also experience the same feelings the employees have put in a different situation. If people feel like their job is unfair, it is not just them who feel that way. Business owners are dealing with unbearable financial losses due to the pandemic crisis. But the fact that they want to continue the business without an assurance of revenue is a huge risk. Their task is now tripled for managers and supervisors due to the necessary cost-cutting that companies do to save the business. The less they require human resources, the more tasks it needs to be given to a limited number of people.

Think About Things That Matter

The pandemic has caused many problems worldwide, and the most affected ones are normal citizens who lost their source of income. But that is not enough reason to blame the economy as they also struggle in keeping the business running. They cannot provide everything for the people, and they also need help. Thus, if the job description requires too much task, people should think about the consequences of accepting the offer. Understandably, they would grab onto it because there are not many vacancies left, and people are dying to get an occupation. But if both sides are not meeting halfway, either one needs to look for another job, and the other declines the application.

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Take Care Of The Overall Health

No one should put their physical, mental, and emotional health on the line only to collect a limited amount of paycheck. People should consider taking care of themselves if they genuinely have to. No job can save them when things go down. So as much as possible, all individuals should focus on healthy routines. It would be impossible to accomplish, considering the global situation, but right now, flexibility and adaptability are highly important. People need to focus on surviving this pandemic more than ever so they can enjoy life once this whole health crisis is over.

 

Health And Counseling: The Truth About Anger

We know it is normal to get angry and upset because sometimes stressors are difficult to bear. We have those moments where we find the world a little uncooperative, and that makes us feel uncomfortable. At times, we endure those pushes that leave us off the edge. There is just too much pressure, and we start to lose our minds. At some point, we validate our rage and believe that it fits at the moment. Thus, we impulsively act out and tend to become very irrational. We would let anger take over our ability to think clearly and create better decisions. It shuts down our sense of consideration towards things like tolerance and compassion.

But the danger of giving in to anger doesn’t stop there. Frequent times, when we get upset, we couldn’t handle it. It is as if we know we have to let all the raging emotions out. Because if we don’t, we know it can cause a lot of trouble than usual. That could lead us to a deep end where nothing will seem okay. We become preoccupied with anger that we didn’t notice it ruining our lives.

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Angry Than Hurt

Most of us can instantly tell the exact reason for our upset feelings. Usually, we get angry because of petty things like not getting what we want, people breaking their promises, hearing negative things about us, small disturbances, etc. The angry feelings we believe caused by unfortunate situations are sometimes not all that there is. In unfortunate conditions, our anger represents our deep sadness and emptiness that we cannot simply express. It is as if we only rely on anger so that we can hide our fears and pain. Let alone deal with it silently.

Over-Blown Sense Of Importance

The funny thing about anger is that usually, it gets a little over the edge, especially when we desire immediate validation. That is even if we are not entirely angry at the situation or there is no reason to be upset at all. Anger has this huge attachment to the statement “I believe I am right” that we hold on to for quite too long. We are somehow focused on one-way thinking that we deserve to be angry because things are not going our way.

Fear-Induced Reaction

While most of us understand that anger is quite a normal reaction to something upsetting, some use it to take advantage of the situation. People with a complicated mindset often feel the need to be angry because it brings them closer to achieving what they want. Regardless of the motive, an angry reaction often leads the other individuals to raise their flags. Anger somehow connotes a fear-induced reaction that supports aggressive behavior towards others.

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Unrealistic Perfection

Usually, when we get angry, one reason is that our expectations did not go our way. We have this specific preference for things that, when it turns out negatively, become overly frustrated. It somehow makes us drawn to perfection that we know is impossible to get. And since we do not lower our standards, our disappointments go up. So when we fail, we become out of control and infuriate. That is the problem because anger holds into our deepest desire for perfection, and eventually, it will start controlling us.

An Unknown Trap

Though it is often common, anger is quite unnecessary to many things. We somehow think that it is significantly important to release the unwanted rage we have. Thus, we yell and shout at others when things are getting out of hand. Somehow, we got by and thought that it is okay since people are used to the aggressive response. Unfortunately, some of us get caught up with anger and give in to its negative impact. That explains why we spit out unnecessary words, humiliating statements, and poor judgment towards others. Anger traps us into a situation where we talk insensitively and act stupidly, and these are things that often make our apologies unacceptable.

It Ends Things

An angry emotion is known by many but understood by few. Some of us can let things go and forget about an angry person’s stupid and insensitive actions. However, some cannot accept it. These individuals take the angry behavior seriously, so they choose to back off and stay away for good. Anger breaks a relationship and even ends it forever. It sets up a barrier and limits both sides to look into reconciliation perspective. Once anger taps into the emotional imbalance, everything becomes a notable source of disconnection.

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Final Thoughts

Learning to control our angry emotions, letting go of things we can’t handle, accepting the truth, and moving on are things that are sometimes incredibly difficult to do. However, if we put our mind and heart into bringing inner peace, we might stop the rage at some point.

 

Frequently Asked Questions About What Depression Looks Like

I bet you know what depression means. Generally, it is related to the unexplained negative thoughts and feelings that affect someone’s behavior. Depression represents sadness and loneliness. It relates to a non-stop emotional turmoil that leads to too much grief. People view depression as a crippling mental health condition that stays for longer periods.

In some cases, it creates intense pressure on an individual’s overall development that affects his goal, self-awareness, and social relationship with others. Yes, these are, in fact, true. Depression is entirely related to isolation, self-doubt, poor concentration, self-neglect, anger, anxiety, and emotional imbalance.

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However, the condition is not limited to vulnerable individuals as it can also affect even those with an outgoing personality. The minority of people dealing with mental health problems also includes those individuals that are extroverts, cheerful and funny, goal-oriented, motivated, and socially active. Thus, it makes the whole situation quite impossible to determine. Sometimes, those who laugh and smile the most are actually the ones who are dealing with severe depressive episodes.

Therefore, depression affects all individuals regardless of their emotional and mental strength. There is no way you can determine the condition just by sticking with the negative signs. There are cases that even if someone tends to be happy all the time, there is no guarantee that what the individual physically shows entirely represents their emotional and mental health state.

If you’re still confused, here are some of the few frequently asked questions that might help you further understand depression from a different perspective.

What is the number 1 cause of depression?

Depression can come from many factors, including faulty mood regulation, the stress in life, financial strain, death or loss of someone you love, medication, chronic illnesses, genetic vulnerability, drugs, and alcohol abuse. In teen depression, factors may also vary. Some of the causes of their mental health problems negatively impact self-esteem, such as academic problems, peer problems, obesity, and long-term bullying. Also, situations like being a victim or witness of violence, such as physical or sexual abuse, contribute greatly.

 What happens with the brain during a depression?

Depression triggers the entrance of cortisol, which damages the amygdala, hippocampus, and dorsomedial thalamus. But with the three, the amygdala often receives a lot of damage since it is responsible for emotional responses. Depression causes the amygdala to enlarge and makes it more active. When this particular enlargement and activeness continue to happen, it causes hormonal imbalance, sleep disturbances, and activity level changes.

What color is associated with depression?

The color associated with depression is the shade of gray. This almost dark hue of black most likely represents an individual’s blank and cloudy mental state. Though the color grey also represents neutrality and balance, it still depicts an emotionless, dull, and empty state of mind. But in general, mental health awareness is represented by a green-colored ribbon. The green was the color used to label individuals who were considered psychologically unstable or insane, especially in the 1800s.

 What type of thinking is often linked to depression?

Negative thinking is often associated with depression. Perhaps that is due to the closed-minded mentality that often leaves no space for positive resolution and intervention. When bad things happen, people begin punishing themselves with thoughts such as I am a total failure, I am no good, or nothing ever goes my way, not knowing that these words can lead to feelings of despair and emptiness that lasts for a long period.

 What age group has the highest rate of depression?

The age group with the most significant rate of depression is individuals aged 18-25. The major depressive episode was reported higher among adult females at 8.7% than males at around 5.3%. These individuals, respectively, reported experiencing two or more symptoms of the mental illness.

 Is it possible to diagnose yourself with depression?

In some instances, a self-test can help you decide what to do whenever you are feeling blue. However, it doesn’t entirely mean that you can clinically conclude your condition based on what you have read, answered, watched, or searched on the internet. Only a mental health expert and professional can diagnose your condition based on the provided symptoms you experience. They are the only ones allowed to treat and prescribe you medication.

 What is the most reliable symptom of depression?

The most reliable symptoms of clinical depression often include uncontrolled feelings of sadness, emptiness, tearfulness, and hopelessness. Usually, you often experience angry outbursts, irritability, and frustration, even over small things. There is also the loss of interest or pleasure in most activities you usually like. With all these symptoms, it is important to understand that every individual suffers from depression differently. Thus, some of the signs might not apply to those who manage their mental health issue well.

 What are the risk factors of depression?

Some of the risk factors linked to depression include genetics. When a family member used to have depression, it is more likely that you will also have it. Also, death or loss of someone you love, conflict, medication, drug and alcohol abuse, and financial strain increases the mental health condition’s risk. Other risk factors like physical, emotional, verbal, and sexual abuse can also trigger and increase the severity of depression.

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 Can your mind create symptoms?

Yes. Your mind can manifest physical symptoms and can make it worse too. That is called psychosomatic. Though many individuals believe that psychosomatic symptoms are unreliable, these are considered real and can have a psychological cause.

 What are the nine types of depression?

The most common types of depression are manic depression or bipolar disorder, persistent depression, Depressive psychosis, premenstrual dysphoric disorder, seasonal depression, situational depression, perinatal depression, and major depression.

 What are the five signs of mental illness?

The five notable indications of mental illness are excessive paranoia, worry, or anxiety. There is also irritability, long-lasting sadness, extreme moods, eating or sleeping patterns changes, and social withdrawal. In some instances, people experience significant tiredness, low energy, or problems sleeping.

 How can I test my mental health?

The first step to test your mental health is to recognize the signs and symptoms. If there is a change in the pattern of thoughts, feelings, and behavior, visit a doctor or mental health professional. You can also consider online screening. It is also considered the most convenient way to learn whether you are enduring the indications of a psychological issue such as anxiety and depression.

 Why is Googling symptoms a bad idea?

Googling your mental health symptoms can sometimes help. However, self-diagnosing your symptoms using tons of information from the internet can mask a potentially dangerous disease. Because in addition to incorrect diagnoses, there are instances that some of the recommendations can make your symptoms worse. It is best to consult professional medical experts if you think you might be having a health issue.

 How can you tell if someone is mentally ill?

Each illness has its symptoms, and individuals experience them differently. But common symptoms of mental illness in adolescents and adults can be general. These include excessive worrying or fear, confused thinking, feeling excessively sad or low, or problems learning and analyzing.

 How do I get better mentally?

You can always feel better when you talk about and deal with your problems. If you can’t, you can always ask for help. Never allow yourself to feel alone. Get in touch with people, take a break from stress, and care for yourself. Remember that some of these tips might work well with others and not with you. With that, you have to find a way to broaden your wellness option and learn coping skills applicable to your physical, mental, and emotional ability.

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Takeaway

Depression is a serious condition that you should address immediately. Of course, there are chances that the signs and symptoms may come extremely indistinguishable. But one should not stop taking care of his or her mental state. It would be the best option to learn more about the sudden emotional and mental changes.

 

Mental Health Problems And Bullying Problems

I used to be hell-bent on denying something for as long as I could remember.

a boy holding a bat
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I am a bully.

Many people used the word “bully” to describe me, but I never identified as such. All I knew was that I was having the best time of my life, not noticing my bullying behavior, and that there was nothing wrong with it. I was pretty much blind to the mental health problems in bullying.

The only wake-up call I had was when I was unwittingly able to witness bullying behavior. I saw my sister experience bullying by a group of seniors forcing her to give them her lunch money when I was in high school. From the other side of the hallway, I could already see them bullying and surrounding a small student backed up on the lockers. No one knew that she was my sister at the time because, hello, it was only the first day of school, and we didn’t walk around together all the time. But as I got closer, I could overhear their conversation.

a fist punching a piece of paper on the ground
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Their Not So Good Conversation

Senior 1: Ooh, cool bag! How much dough did your momma give you today, Ms. Freshman?

Sister: Uhm, $10. Why do you care?

Senior 2 (grabbing her bag): That’s cool. Let’s see how crisp a ten-dollar bill is now. (He proceeded to rummage through the bag.)

When I showed up, my sister ran straight to me and hid behind me, while the bullies dropped her bag. One managed to ask, “Do you know this girl?” 

With my head held up, I said, “Yes, she’s my sister. Have you got a problem with her?”

girl sitting on a bench and happy she is not getting bullied anymore
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No one tried to bully my little sister again after that. However, that incident of bullying and aggressive behavior showed me that I was also a bully like those other kids. I would never try to steal someone’s money or cause physical injury to them if they didn’t give it immediately, but I used to join in when my classmates passed around some student’s backpack or turned them into laughingstocks. No matter if it was five students ganging up on a few bully victims. Heck, I even high-fived the boys who flipped the girls’ skirts in the hallways. The victims of bullying endure my antics.

I had been wrong, and I know it now. 

Hitting Rock-Bottom (Intentionally)

I was honestly ashamed to admit to my family that I was a bully, that I had bullying and aggressive behavior, even though I wanted to do everything to rectify my mistakes. It’s just that my parents had always been kind and law-abiding citizens their entire lives; I didn’t want them to feel like there’s something wrong with their parenting skills. Thus, in the beginning, I kept the news to myself.

I looked up the reasons behind bullying behaviors on the internet and found that peer pressure was on top of the list. That’s correct—I had seen it happen first-hand—but I didn’t think it applied much to me. In reality, some of my friends were blatantly telling me to stop messing with others, so they were obviously not pressuring me to bully anyone. 

Some folks also said that it could be a way to make someone pay for whatever they did to the bully. Well, since I was among the biggest football players at school, I had never encountered a fellow high school student who poked fun at me. It was usually the other way around, so no, it wasn’t due to payback either.

Then, after some time, I came across two words: pleasure and popularity.

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Source: pxfuel.com

Being On A Football Team

As mentioned above, I was on the football team. The taller and bulkier a player was, the higher their popularity level was. And I wasn’t exempted from that. Almost every day, I would open my locker and see love letters and proposals from girls who wanted to be my girlfriend. Besides that, some guys looked up to me, and I wanted to show how cool I was by—pardon my French—helping them bully others.  

I guess I liked the attention a little too much, to the extent that I didn’t see how the power imbalance and my bullying behavior started having adverse effects on others’ lives. These possibly included severe long term mental health effects on bullied children, like suicidal behavior, substance abuse, anxiety disorders, emotional problems, and low self esteem. Really, I can only imagine the emotional health and mental health effects of bullying behavior on other people’s mental well-being.

Seeking Psychological Help

When I realized what was probably wrong with me (specifically my mental and behavioral problems), I asked my parents if they could contact me or take me to a mental health professional. Although I had an idea of curbing my bullying tendencies, I felt the need to consult a mental health expert or psychologist before I faced anyone at school again. In the process, I also had to tell my parents about my awful behavior (mental health, bullying). They were disappointed with me, but they were willing to give me another chance because they saw how much I wanted to turn my health and life around.

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Source: pxfuel.com

The psychologist said that I should apologize to every person that I bullied. There were a few of them, so I spent an entire month tracking them down and finding a way to make them accept my apology after bullying them. After that, the mental health expert recommended that I attend group counseling with fellow reforming teenage bullies. I did not know how it would benefit my mental health initially, but I was glad to sign up for it without asking too many questions because I ended up loving it and not having any problems. 

Answering the question “is bullying a mental disorder“, I was able to understand the link between mental health issues in bullying. I was able to see its mental health effects and understand how addressing bullying behavior can help me improve.

Five years later, I am already taking a Master’s degree in Child Psychology. Bullying is nothing but a part of my history. When I finish all the necessary training, I want to help troubled teenagers (like I have once been) get their lives back on track after dealing with bullying.

Counseling is one of the best bullying prevention strategies. It can help with addressing bullying, basically disease control, and mitigate the effects of bullying, especially in public schools. Counseling can also help address the effects of bullying on mental health.

FAQs

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